New scientist online dating
There goes Miss Neurotic, no-fun, picks at a salad instead of enjoying a good night out, probably holds her tummy in while having sex and worries about cellulite instead of admiring me.' In general, men are a lazy lot who are much happier with Miss Low Maintenance.
A woman with a generous body and a nature to match, who won't cast too critical an eye on their own two bellies and ingrowing toe-nails.
Are you a 5ft 4in tall female with a 30in waist, 40in hips, who tries to avoid seeing your reflection in the mirror? And there we were thinking it was poor little Cheryl Cole, or that painfully plain Uma Thurman, even skinny bones Sienna.
And are you frankly dreading the summer holidays because you won't be able to hide those uncooked chipolata arms under a cardigan, and counting every calorie in a Muller Lite toffee yogurt (98) and generally feeling trapped in a cycle of self-loathing and crash dieting? Now, it turns out that what turns men on is a well-upholstered size 14.
The thing is, men can't help loving well-rounded women - those curves are a sign of fertility and they are genetically drawn to them because they signal that we will successfully conceive, carry and then nurture their offspring. I wouldn't want a load of elbows and ribs to cuddle in bed either. The only people ever to have made unpleasant comments about my size are other women.
I've been told clothes are unflattering, asked whether I have considered trying the latest diet, and was recently asked if I have given up running while being looked up and down disparagingly. Thin women are skinny for other women - not for men.
I bet even Posh, the human wishbone, is fretting about some unsightly millimetre of adipose tissue between her tootsies. How many of us look back on our lovely 21-year-old selves and wonder why the hell we didn't walk down the street waving a poster saying "I have a 24in waist"?
Not only that, but it costs just a few pounds for a huge tub. I am just about spot-on the vital statistics of the Miss Average who was identified in a new survey as being the dream woman for most men: 5ft 4in tall, a size 14 with a waist that hovers around 30in, rounded hips and a 36DD bust. I've never had any complaints from men about my looks. In fact, men have only ever commented positively about my eyes, smile, skin and breasts (obviously - they're only men, after all). In fact, when I have ever lamented my rather generous proportions, they have only ever given my bottom a good squeeze and told me not to be ridiculous.
Still starting that new diet in the morning, girls?